[Milton-L] awkwardness

Michael Gillum mgillum at unca.edu
Fri Apr 15 12:07:07 EDT 2016


Louis, that's very good stuff. Incidentally, I don't think the Alcestis
simile is "chilly"; I was referring to the diction of line 1. The simile is
apt and moving, though indeed bookish. There is also emotional warmth in
the purification simile, in that the wife is returning to the marriage bed
after a long absence. That point can get lost if readers are too caught up
in the typological stuff to think about what it would feel like to the
husband and wife.

On Fri, Apr 15, 2016 at 11:37 AM, Schwartz, Louis <lschwart at richmond.edu>
wrote:

> You're absolutely right that every line doesn't have to sing. In fact,
> part of what I find beautiful in this poem is the way it swings between
> poles of lyricism and something at least on the surface flatter and
> slightly strained.  And you're right that the diction and the similes
> are oddly bookish, although I wouldn't call them "chilly."  I think you're
> right that one way to look at it is as the representation of a strategy to
> contain the emotions, but I also think it's the representation of someone
> trying to communicate a very complex meaning that he doesn't fully grasp,
> and an experience that he knows was not "real" and yet he feels is full of
> significance (and that both makes him uneasy and full of longing).   What
> you say about packing a lot of information into just a few syllables is
> precisely what I think is so artful--and peculiarly Miltonic--about the
> poem.  A big part of the strange effect of the poem for me is the way those
> pedantic bits carry a straining toward meaning that has its own emotional
> weight, and an important part of their burden is in the allusions they make
> and suggest.  And that straining is also, I think, reflected in the syntax
> and prosody.
>
>
> I think, also, that the emphatic stresses (and the extra ones) that Milton
> makes available in lines 7 and 8 provide an opportunity to recite those
> lines with a rising urgency that carries the energy of the long sentence
> into its climax at the beginning of line 9.  And the energy of that rhythm
> carries the mounting excitement of the speaker's trust that what he saw in
> the dream is a figure of what he will have again at some point.  Then, of
> course, it deflates into the sad conclusion of the poem, lifting again with
> the stresses on "love," "sweet-," "good," "per-," "shined," "clear," and
> "face" before falling though the internal rhyme on "embrace" to the dark
> final line with its puzzled sequence of waking and fleeing.
>
>
> Louis
>
>
> ======================
> Louis Schwartz
> Professor of English
> Chair, Department of English
> University of Richmond
> Richmond, VA  23173
> (804) 289-8315
> lschwart at richmond.edu
> ------------------------------
> *From:* milton-l-bounces at richmond.edu <milton-l-bounces at richmond.edu> on
> behalf of Michael Gillum <mgillum at unca.edu>
> *Sent:* Friday, April 15, 2016 9:49 AM
> *To:* John Milton Discussion List
> *Subject:* Re: [Milton-L] awkwardness
>
> Why does every line need to "sing"? Does the topic of ritual purification
> call for flights of lyricism? I don't see why some irregularities of rhythm
> turn a sonnet "poor." Richardson delivers the line in a conversational
> rhythm that is not ugly, and that, I think, dimly reflects the metrical
> scansions offered by Leonard and me. To me, the interesting point is the
> way he suppresses the "as whom" that, being grammatically incoherent, is a
> genuine fault in the poem.
>
> The other thing I would fault is the diction in "my late espoused saint,"
> which seems a chilly and pedantic way to characterize the lady. It put me
> off when I first approached the poem. If I were forced to defend the
> phrase, I would say that it does pack a lot of information into a few
> syllables, and that this language, along with the bookishness of the
> similes, might be seen to reflect a strategy of containing the powerful
> emotion that breaks out in the last several lines.
>
> On Thu, Apr 14, 2016 at 9:48 PM, Schwartz, Louis <lschwart at richmond.edu>
> wrote:
>
>> Greg,
>>
>>
>> I hate to have to respond to this sort of assertion at all, but I'll
>> simply say, with as much restraint as I can muster, that I do not perceive
>> the line as a flaw (same with the choppiness that bothers you about "trust
>> to have/ Full sight of her in heaven without restraint" or the whole
>> syntactic movement from "Mine" to "mind").  If you would like to have an
>> actual conversation about this, including my sense of the straining that is
>> there in the lines, I'm happy to have it, but not if you're just going to
>> suggest I'm deluded.
>>
>>>>
>> For what it's worth, I don't see the point of raising a little flag in
>> chaos.
>>
>>
>> Louis
>>
>>
>> ======================
>> Louis Schwartz
>> Professor of English
>> Chair, Department of English
>> University of Richmond
>> Richmond, VA  23173
>> (804) 289-8315
>> lschwart at richmond.edu
>> ------------------------------
>> *From:* milton-l-bounces at richmond.edu <milton-l-bounces at richmond.edu> on
>> behalf of Gregory Machacek <Gregory.Machacek at marist.edu>
>> *Sent:* Thursday, April 14, 2016 5:31 PM
>> *To:* John Milton Discussion List
>> *Subject:* [Milton-L] awkwardness
>>
>> Responding to the bolded below.  So, yes, listen to the lovely delivery
>> of Ian Richardson to which Hugh Richmond directed our attention
>>
>>
>> http://miltonrevealed.berkeley.edu/videos/john-miltons-sonnet-xxiii-his-dead-wife-1658-ian-richardson
>>
>> and tell me that you don't hear, amid all the beautifully conveyed
>> rhythms of Richardson's performance, the arrhythmia in "Purification in the
>> old law."  Then look at, for example, Louis Schwartz's scansion-- [
>> /xx/xxx//x/]--and ask whether one would ever expect to hear rhythm in
>> any line that could be so marked.  (There's a little choppiness too in
>> "trust to have / Full sight of her in")
>>
>> This arrythmia (and it's Milton's; Richardson has downplayed it in
>> performance as far as it can be downplayed) *matters* because the
>> proposed beauty of this section is the suspension established with "Mine"
>> and only resolved with "came".  There's scarcely anything more satisfying
>> in English literature than the moment one of Milton's well-constructed
>> suspended sentences resolves itself:  "without thee is sweet."  But this is
>> not one of those.  The verbal stuff over or through which a suspension
>> moves has to be of a certain quality.  Here Milton does what in PL Marvell
>> thinks he never does:  "flags," fails to keep "on wing."  The *idea* that
>> stuff about the wife intervenes between "Mine" and "came," delaying the
>> "came," would make for a good poem is correct; but that notion doesn't
>> survive an actual listen.
>>
>> There's more to be said about the content of "Purification in the old law
>> did save," but for now I'll take Jim as saying that he heard awkwardness
>> here.  Michael Gillum has called the line "ragged and unmusical".  Michael
>> Bryson is open to the notion that this could be described as a poor poem.
>> No small number of embryon atoms are swarming populous around my flag (or
>> Johnson's, however you regard it.)
>>
>>
>> Greg Machacek
>> Professor of English
>> Marist College
>>
>>
>> -----milton-l-bounces at richmond.edu wrote: -----
>> To: John Milton Discussion List <milton-l at richmond.edu>
>> From: James Rovira
>> Sent by: milton-l-bounces at richmond.edu
>> Date: 04/14/2016 03:37PM
>> Subject: Re: [Milton-L] victory conditions
>>
>> I think the discussion has been wonderfully instructive regardless of the
>> conclusions reached... or not.
>>
>> *I think we need to use scansion as an explanatory device to explain why
>> the poem may (or may not) sound awkward at points* when read aloud
>> rather than starting with scansion to evaluate the poem's use meter.
>> Scanning the poem should provide the "why" for the "what." It's at that
>> point that we begin to hear each other's reading of the poem.
>>
>> Jim R
>>
>> On Thu, Apr 14, 2016 at 2:29 PM, Gregory Machacek <
>> Gregory.Machacek at marist.edu> wrote:
>>
>>> For me to declare victory, I would have to convince a site full of
>>> Miltonists (all who weigh in; lurkers don't count one direction or the
>>> other) that "Methought I saw" is a poor sonnet.  I think I've made the
>>> stakes for myself sufficiently demanding.  Our era's tendency
>>> interpretively to recuperate poorly crafted verses is just a sub-issue of
>>> this larger challenge to which I've engaged myself.
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> Greg Machacek
>>> Professor of English
>>> Marist College
>>>
>>
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